Survival, Secrets And Love
by SparkleInTheSun
Summary: He was the one who had invited her to the party,he was the one who had left her alone,he was the one who got too caught up flirting with some girl&he was the one who blamed himself for the consequences. Will he be able to help Sonny, or is it too late?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I own it all. Prove that I don't. **

**~ Chapter One ~**

Sonny looked around as the party started around her, biting down on her lower lip as she watched her best friends dancing in the middle of it all, drinks already in their hands. She frowned as she looked for Chad in the crowd, he was the one who had forced her to come here in the first place.

She sighed as she scanned for him in the crowd, he had disappeared from her side for the first time since they had got there ten minutes ago, saying something about getting them drinks and she hadn't seen him since.

She bit down on her lower lip, staying where she was because she didn't really know anyone else other than her cast members and some of the McKenzie Falls cast that she had never really spoken to.

"Hey beautiful." She turned to look at the tall, muscular boy standing next to her, smiling a little at him before turning back and trying to make it as obvious as she could that she waiting for someone. She heaved a deep sigh of relief when she finally saw him, grinning and waving at her.

She wrinkled her nose a little when the boy leaned a little closer to her and brushed some hair out of her face, she could smell the alcohol on him, making her feel slightly sick.

"Is that your boyfriend?" He whispered seductively in her ear, Sonny bit down on her lip for a moment, wondering what to say – was Chad her boyfriend? Neither of them knew what they were.

"Uh.."

"You're way too gorgeous for him babe." He grinned at her but Sonny just rolled her eyes and turned to face the other way, wishing Chad would just make his way through the crowd faster.

"Why are you being so cold sexy?" She shuddered a little when she felt his alcohol filled breath on her neck, pulling her hand away when he grabbed it, tears threatening to fall down her now pale face.

"Don't even think about screaming." He muttered as he grabbed her hand again, she looked at him for a moment, shaking her head before she felt something sharp prod into her lower back. She closed her eyes, refusing to let any tears fall as she tried to think of the best way out of this whole mess.

Her whole body shook as he quickly walked off, leading her to an upstairs bedroom, she could only wish that someone would be able to see the knife she knew he held in his hands.

"What do you want?" She whispered as he dug the knife deeper into her skin, she could feel gentle drops of blood falling a little down her back as he did. She winced a little but didn't cry, she was strong, she had to show him how strong she was.

He laughed loudly and then shook his head,

"I want you." He bit down on her shoulder – hard as Sonny looked away from him, her whole body shaking in fear when she came to the realization of what was going to happen to her.

"No.. please." She whimpered, biting down on her lip as tears finally fell down her face, she shook her head at the large boy who was now standing in front of her as he carried on walking closer and closer towards her until she fell on the bed behind her.

She looked around the room he had forced her into only five minutes ago, more and more tears carving their way down her skin as she realized what was going to happen, what he was going to do.

As she fell down she could hear him laughing loudly, biting down on her lip to stop the scream she could feel bubbling up in her throat as she wiped away the tears that were leaving a shiny track on her face, the moonlight from the window almost making them look silver.

"Please, my boyfriend will come looking for me. He will kill you, just leave me alone while you can, I won't tell anyone." She knew that Chad wasn't her boyfriend but she also knew that he would protect her, she looked at the door willing for it to open, willing for her to be right.

She closed her eyes briefly and looked away, screaming in pain when she felt a sudden burning sensation on her arm. She looked at him quickly and then down at her arm, trying to discover what the source of the pain was. Her eyes wandered to the cigarette that was now laying on the floor, shaking her head in shock as he smiled down at her and started to play with her hair.

She pulled away and closed her eyes, mentally preparing herself, she pictured the bedroom door and how long it would take to get there. She had a plan – she could find Chad and he would kill him and then she would be okay.

She smiled a little when she heard the light clang as he put the knife down next to them, and she knew she had to make her move now before it was too late.

Then he lay on top of her, she could smell the mixture of smoke and alcohol on his breath and she yelled in pain when he grabbed both of her wrists to pin her down. She looked at the door and shook her head, tears falling down her cheeks when she knew she was helpless now, she was stuck.

She closed her eyes tightly, praying softly to a God she had never fully believed in, had never wanted to believe in since her grandfather's death when she was five. She prayed that someone would find her, she prayed that he would suddenly sober up and realize this wasn't right and she prayed that this wasn't happening.

She tried to kick him before he could do anything but she could hardly move under his weight, she watched him slide her skirt down her legs and she couldn't help but blame herself for wearing that tonight – she had been trying to impress Chad.

She looked at the greed in his piercing green eyes that contrasted with Chad's soft, blue eyes. She closed her eyes so she wouldn't have to watch anything else. She promised herself that no matter what happened she wasn't going to open them, she froze in fear all of a sudden then when she felt his hands all over her naked body.

She didn't scream from the pain, she didn't open her eyes when he slapped her across the face, she just let the tears fall quickly from her shut lids and turned her head to the side. It will be over soon, she kept telling herself.

And then it was over.

She opened her eyes finally when the door closed behind him, looking around the room. She sat there for a few minutes, almost afraid that he was going to come back for more. She didn't look away from the door, silently praying that it was in fact over and he wouldn't come back.

It take one hour of laying there and waiting for him until she realized that he was gone, she bit down on her lip and quickly covered herself up, finding that she could finally move. She slowly got dressed, ignoring the pain that shot through her shaking body as she crept over to the door, looking around just to be sure that he wasn't waiting for her.

When all was clear she ran out of there as fast as she could, running away from the party, she could still hear everyone laughing and shouting – they were all happy. It was too hard.

She walked out to the main road, stumbling down every now and again, trying to find her way back home before anything else could happen to her.

**A/N: Oh, how fantastically depressing, aren't you all proud of me? **

**Predictable really.**

**Drop me a review, and let me know whether you want me to carry on with this or not. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Two ~ **

Sonny lightly dabbed the foundation down on her black eye, hoping that she could cover it up. She wasn't sure if she could handle all the questions that were going to be aimed at her. She wondered if Tawni had noticed that Sonny wasn't at the party, if she had gone without her anyway, without worrying. She bit down on her lip as she thought about ditching Tawni at that party, knowing she had no choice.

She bit down as hard as she could on her lip when she felt tears threatening to fall from her dull, brown eyes as she looked at her own reflection, finding herself wishing that she had never gone. She only went to impress Chad, she only went because he asked her to.

She shook her head, if she hadn't been so caught up in her own feelings for the one boy who would probably never see her in that way, then she wouldn't have gone, she wouldn't have worn that short skirt and she wouldn't have been raped. She blamed herself.

She heaved a deep sigh before running out of her room, knowing she was going to be late for her first day back at work since.. it happened. She shuddered a little, shaking her head as tears glazed her eyes once more. Two whole days had passed, and she hadn't been able to say a word.

She found herself glad that her mum had moved back to Wisconsin last month, she preferred to be alone, she preferred the quiet. She let it all consume her as she sat in her bedroom, slightly rocking back and forth as the tears never seemed to stop carving their way down her pale, bruised face.

She welcomed the night time, she loved being able to sit in the darkness and pretend like nothing had ever happened to her. She just liked to look out of her window at the beautiful stars and moon and now that somewhere out there, people were happy – even when she wasn't.

She had been dreading today since it had happened, but she knew that she had to carry on living, as hard as it seemed.. she had to pretend like it never happened. She wondered that if she pretended for long enough, then she would start to believe it as well. Maybe.

- - - - - - - -

"Sonny!" Sonny stopped in her tracks, turning around to face Tawni as she shook her head.

"Where have you been? I haven't seen or heard from you since that party?" Sonny just looked down at the floor,

"What happened?" She bit down on her lip, finally looking back up after a few moments of silence between the two, only to see Tawni still standing there with her hands on her hips, staring at her. Sonny gulped a little, not knowing what to say as she tried to conjure up a word – any word – in her mind.

She took an unconscious step backwards when Tawni and sighed and walked towards her, suddenly feeling uneasy.

"What's going on with you?" Sonny just shook her head, knowing the right card to play to get Tawni to leave her alone -

"You don't care, do you?" She tried to smile, sighing in relief when Tawni scoffed and then shook her head,

"I don't do caring Sonny, you should know that." Sonny just shrugged and then walked past her,

"Class is this way?" Tawni rolled her eyes, pointing in the opposite direction, biting down on her lip when Sonny just nodded and turned back around to walk with her. It was a one sided conversation all the way there as Tawni went on and on about how pretty she was and how much fun the party was.

Sonny closed her eyes in relief when they finally got into the classroom, she used to hate school but now she knows that she had to do everything and anything she can to make sure that she doesn't think about that time. She needed to distract herself.

"Long time no see Munroe." She jumps a little as she hears his voice just behind her before he takes the seat next to her. She had almost forgotten that MacKenzie Falls was in school with them now. He grinned at her, getting out all of his books as Sonny just nodded and looked down at the desk, staring at in intently as she tried to avoid any eye contact with anyone.

She wondered if Chad had ever liked her, but then realized she didn't even care anymore. It didn't matter, she didn't even like herself. She hated herself for letting that boy do something to her that she promised would never happen to herself, she was convinced she could have done something to stop him and she had to live with that for the rest of her life.

She didn't want anyone to find out, she didn't want people to carry on believing that poor, naïve Sonny was completely incapable of looking after herself at her first – and last – Hollywood party. She didn't want anyone to know how stupid she had been, she knew they would all blame her for it, for letting him do that to her when she could have so easily asked someone for help. She didn't even understand why she didn't scream or run and she didn't expect anyone else to understand.

"Aren't you going to talk to me today?" Chad flashed her his best smile, finding himself missing their daily little arguments as he reached out for her head and lightly placed his hand on top of it. Sonny jumped a little, yanking her hand back as quickly as she could and turned away from him. Her whole body shook as she thought about someone touching her, closing her eyes tightly – she tried to calm herself down. She knew that everyone would find out if she carried on like that, they were all going to guess.

"What the hell Munroe? What did I do?"

"Just get on with your work." She muttered, grabbing her pen again and writing down everything Mrs Bitterman had written on the board.

"Whatever Sonshine, I was only asking." He rolled his eyes, turning around and whispering something to someone behind them. Sonny could feel tears blur her vision as she thought about how some people just couldn't seem to mind their own business.

She closed her eyes as the whispers seemed to be getting louder and louder, trying to focus on her work, trying to ignore everyone. She looks up at Chad, whispering something to Tawni and Nico, shaking his head. She can see the looks on their faces, and she watches Grady behind them.

She sighs, bites down on her lip before grabbing everything and running out of there as fast as she can. She can't handle everyone knowing, she can't handle people staring at her and just **knowing. **

She finally let the tears fall down her face as she runs away from it all, from everyone who thinks that they know what happened, from the watching eyes and the suspicious whispers.

She slams the door to her dressing room, sliding down the door as sobs wrack her already shaking body. She closes her eyes as she tries to think about all those times she could have screamed or ran away, all those chances she had but had never taken.

Tears stung her eyes again as she thought about it all, telling herself that she deserved it because she didn't fight him off. She believed it was all her fault.

She looked up for a moment, around at the room she had once loved so much, the room she never believed she would be in and the room that felt so good to call her own. But nothing was good anymore, nothing felt the same as it did before. She let the secret eat away at her, but she couldn't tell anyone, she didn't want anyone else to be hurt.

She wiped away the hot tears as they fell from her eyes, shaking her head as she slowly got up and walked over to the settee.

"Why me?" She whispered to herself,

"Why did it have to happen to me?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Three ~ **

Chad grinned to himself as he walked into the classroom, feeling slightly happy that the only empty seat was next to Sonny. He took in her appearance, the way her hair was tied up in a loose bun, stray bits dangling over her face as she stared intently at the desk in front of her. He noticed how pale she was, only just being able to make out the edges of a dark bruise he could see hidden beneath some make-up,

He frowned before walking over, "Long time no see Munroe." He said before taking the seat next to her, winking at her as he sat down. He had no idea what had happened to her at that party, but he was going to make it his mission to find out.

He bit down on his lip for a moment as she looked up at him, his eyes meeting hers for a split second before she quickly looked back down at the desk. He grinned before anyone could see him actually caring for her, waiting for her to say something but instead she kept her head down, trying her best to act like he wasn't there.

He found himself wondering if anything was actually wrong, or if she just hated him so much that the mere thought of sitting next to him repulsed her. He shook it the thought off as quickly as it had come – nobody could ever hate him. He was **the **Chad Dylan Cooper.

He nibbled down on his lip as he watched her from the corner of his eye, the way she wrote down every single word with such immense concentration fascinated him – he had sat down next to her in class a few times, and she was never like that.

His concern only deepened when he could see the tears glaze over her beautiful eyes that were usually so full of life. He could almost see the guilt burning a hole through him as he thought back to that party, if something had happened to her then he knew it would be all his fault.

**He **was the one who forced her to go in the first place.

**He **was the one who left her alone.

**He **was the one who spent an hour getting drinks because he had bumped into a group of girls.

**He** was the one who didn't go looking for her when he realized she was missing.

And he knew that if anything happened to her like everyone had been saying it had then it would be him that was to blame.

"Aren't you going to talk to me today?" Chad decided to break the silence between them as he stared at her, flashing her his best smile as he found himself missing the conversation between the two. He took a deep breath before reaching out for her hand, deciding it was probably best to comfort her, placing it lightly on top of hers. He felt her jump before pulling it away, and he saw the tears before she managed to turn her head away from him.

He gulped at the sight of the girl who was so happy all the time, break down in front of his very eyes. The way her body shook, the way she refused to let him touch her – he thought he knew what happened, it was just what everyone had said.

"What the hell Munroe? What did I do?" He knew what he had done, he had left her on her own even though she was the only reason he wanted to come, he wanted to spend time with her and now look what had happened.

"Just get on with you work." She muttered as she grabbed her pen and started to write again, Chad shook his head in disbelief, he knew she had tried to make herself sound as strong as possible but he heard she slight tremble in her voice.

"Whatever Sonshine, I was only asking." He rolled his eyes, not wanting her to know that he cared, he wasn't ready for that just yet and he knew neither was she. He bit down on his lip before turning around and looking at Tawni,

"I think you were right." He whispered to her, he looked back at Sonny and shook his head as she completely froze.

"What?" The fear in Tawni's voice was evident, it was only a guess, she had only been going by what someone else had told her.

"You just saw.." Chad looked at Nico as he nodded, biting down on his lip before putting an arm around Tawni who looked as though she was about to burst out crying at any moment.

He heard Sonny heave a deep, sad sigh before getting up as fast as she could, leaving them all behind. He watched her for a moment, looking back at her friends before deciding that he had to let her know that he would be there for her.

"I will go check on her." He muttered to Mrs Bitterman before running out, hearing the hushed whispers of the people he worked with behind him.

He quietly opened the dressing room door, almost crying at the sight of the girl shaking on the sofa, her arms wrapped around herself as heavy tears fell down her face.

"Why did this have to happen to me?" She whispered to herself, putting her hand over her mouth to stop herself from crying loudly. Chad shook his head and sighed, backing out of the room and walking back into the classroom.

"Mrs Bitterman?" He looked at the sour woman and sighed,

"Sonny really needs Tawni right now, is that okay?"

"Fine, Mr Cooper sit down, Hart just go." Tawni jumped up, giving Chad a small smile before running in the same direction as he had only five minutes ago.

- - - - - - - - -

Tawni bit down on her lip as she entered their dressing room, looking at the girl on the settee, she could almost feel her heart break as she watched the tears fall down her pale face, ruining her make-up so a bruise could only just be made out in sharp contrast to her ghost like skin.

Tawni hated the whole caring thing, but she knew that Sonny was her best friend, as much as she wanted to deny it – Sonny was her only friend (That was a girl).

"Hey." She bit down on her lip when Sonny jumped, shaking with sudden fear as she turned around and noticed Tawni standing there. She smiled as she walked over and sat down next to her, being careful not to make any sudden movements.

"What happened at that party Sonny?" Tawni finally whispered,

"Nothing."

"I know something happened, I am not stupid, please tell me.."

"I can't." Sonny looked at the girl who she had always considered to be her best friend as tears poured down her face, shaking her head as she tried her best to hold back the inevitable sobs.

"Did someone hurt you?" Sonny just nodded, not daring to say anything else,

"It's going to be okay, you need to tell the police."

"I can't tell anyone, I can't."

"Did you know him?" Sonny looked up, thinking for a moment before shaking her head,

"No, he was older than us, but I have never seen him around."

"I am so sorry, I never should have left you on your own..."

"You didn't think I was on my own though – you thought I was with Chad." Sonny whispered sadly, she wasn't sure if she blamed Chad yet, but one thing was for sure – she blamed herself.

"It's going to be okay." Tawni told her, trying to smile through her own tears as she watched Sonny curl up in a tight ball, trying to forget that this world was full of cruel people.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Four ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

I should have screamed, I should have fought him off, I should have got out of there while I could. I could have run away from him, he couldn't have stabbed me then. I shake my head at my own thoughts, it's so much easier to think of all that now but at the time I completely froze, I couldn't think straight, I couldn't even see straight. I just wanted him to leave me alone, I just wanted it to stop. I couldn't even think about anything else.

I look up at the dressing room door, it's been two days since my conversation with Tawni and even though she thinks she knows what happened, I haven't confirmed anything. I am too scared to tell anyone, I don't want them to look at me and just know what he did to me, I don't want to hear them say how sorry they are for me but then in their heads I know what they will be thinking – 'she could have got away from him, she was obviously asking for it, I mean did you see what she was wearing?'.

I bite down on my lip as I close my eyes, maybe if I didn't wear that skirt or that skimpy top then I wouldn't have gone through that, maybe if I hadn't have dressed like that just to get Chad's attention then it wouldn't have happened to me.

I sigh, my life is full of what ifs and maybes right now, what if I hadn't gone to the party? What if I hadn't dressed like that? What if I didn't like Chad in that way? What if he hadn't left me alone for so long? What if I had screamed? What if I had loosened up a little and danced like everyone else? What if, what if, what if?

- - - - - - - - - - -

**~ Nobody's POV ~**

Chad took a deep breath before opening the door to the dressing room he knew so well, looking around quickly before his eyes settled on the girl huddled in a corner of the room.

"Are you okay?" He frowned, walking slowly over to her as she looked up at him, he wanted to shake her and ask her what happened at that party - that had happened nearly a week ago now - when he saw the obvious pain and fear in her big, brown eyes.

"I just want to be alone right now." She whispered, breaking the eye contact as she put her head on her knees and took a deep, shaking breath. She tightened the grip she had on her knees as she felt him move even closer to her,

"Will you tell me what happened?" He finally said after a few moments of silence between the two, Sonny shook her head and looked up at him, staring into his deep, blue eyes for a moment before looking away again. "It has nothing to do with you."

"Everything is to do with me, I'm Chad Dylan Cooper." He laughed a little, stopping when he saw the tears about to fall down her face.

"I'm sorry." He muttered, shaking his head as he sat down next to her, he felt the sudden urge to wrap his arms around her and tell her that it was all going to be okay, but from what he had heard from everyone else he knew the gesture wouldn't be welcomed.

"Please Sonny, I think you're the only person I have ever cared about, other than myself of course.. I want to help you."

"I don't need your help Chad." She glared at him, her heart racing as she resisted the urge to throw her arms around him and tell him everything that had happened, and instead seeking comfort in her own arms as she dug her nails further and further into her skin.

"I won't leave until you tell me."

"Then I will leave instead." She muttered, moving to stand up, jumping back when she felt his hand on her shoulder. She could feel the guilt, shame and hatred run through her all at once as she stood up, staring at him as he stood up as well.

"You have to tell me what happened."

"Just stay out of my life!" Sonny gritted her teeth, her voice raising as she turned away from him, wondering how long it would take her to run out of that door and as far away from the one person she wanted to tell more than anyone else.

"Look at me!" Chad could feel his own temper rising as he grabbed her shoulder, wanting to kill whoever hurt her, turning her to face him, "Just get away from me! Leave me alone! Stay out of my life! Just..." Sonny screamed, hitting him over and over again as tears ran down her face, pushing him as far as possible away from her.

Chad looked on in shock as she suddenly snapped, running around the dressing room, wrecking everything she could get her hands on. He couldn't move as glass shattered around him, the room slowly becoming a huge mess as she chucked everything off her dressing table and the shelves in the room.

He didn't see anyone else walk until Tawni grabbed Sonny, rubbing her back gently as she glared at Chad. He could feel a hand on his shoulder as a lone tear ran down his own pale face, as he looked at the massive destruction around the room.

"Just leave her alone." Grady whispered, shaking his head as he watched on as Sonny collapsed down to the ground, still in Tawni's arms as she sobbed, lightly screaming into her best friends shirt, gripping it as tightly as she could in her shaking hands.

"It's going to be okay," Tawni whispered to the girl, tears running down her own face, "Chad just go!" She shook her head at him, looking down at the shaking girl in her arms.

"What happened in here?" Marshall looked around the room as he ran in, Nico not far behind him,

"I called your mum Sonny." Nico called, not making a move towards the girl, he had learned two days ago what happened when he even tried to touch her – he managed to get a black eye from it.

Chad had no idea what to do as he looked from Sonny and Tawni to Grady who was still standing next to him.

"What did I do?" He asked after a few seconds,

"She doesn't like being touched." Grady muttered,

"Most rape victims don't." Zora suddenly appeared from behind them,

"You think that's what happened?"

"Of course, there is no other explanation." Nico walked over to them, his arms crossed over his chest as he watched the usually happy girl break down right in front of them.

"She's never been as bad as this though." Grady added in,

"Yeah, there has been punches, running away, screaming and shouting, tears but it has never this bad.. what did you say to her?"

"I got a little mad.. I just wanted her to talk about it. I wanted to help her or something..."

"Well next time, leave her alone." Grady warned, his own arms crossed over his chest now as he glared at the boy, shaking his head in disgust as he watched Connie run through the door, luckily only having been a few minutes away in work.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered mostly to himself as he watched Connie wrap her arms around her daughter, lifting her up in her arms as Sonny wrapped her arms around her mum's neck.

"I am thinking of taking her back home for a few weeks.." Connie whispered to Marshall, he nodded quickly as he looked at the shaking girl in her mother's arms,

"Take all the time you need, her job will always be waiting for her." Connie gratefully smiled, thanking everyone before leaving the room.

"Don't you dare do that again!" Tawni stood up, marching over to Chad before slapping him hard across the face, he put his hand on his burning cheek as he bit down on his lip to stop himself from saying something to her,

"Do you have any idea what she has been through? How much worse you have just made it?!" Chad opened his mouth, wondering if Sonny did this to everyone – made them care even when they never have been able to show how much they did care beforehand.

"I just wanted her to tell me." He finally said,

"Well next time, when she says leave her alone, then you leave her the hell alone!" Chad nodded, gulping a little at the sight of an angry and upset Tawni in front of him.

"I'm sorry." He said for the third time that day, wondering what had come over him.

"Just get out!" She finally screamed, moving to slap him again before Nico puled her back into his arms and motioned for Chad to get out of there. He nodded, shaking his head as tears rolled down his cheeks, almost running to his dressing room.

He hated himself so much for leaving her alone at the party, he hated himself for pushing her into telling him when she didn't want him to know, she didn't want anyone to know. He cried out in pain as he punched a wall as hard as he could, wishing he had never gone to her dressing room in the first place. He never wanted to see that fear or pain on her face ever again, never.

**A/N: Depressing, well it was for me anyway. What did you all think of this chapter? If I am honest this was probably my favourite chapter to write, despite the depressing angst occurring in this one. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Five ~ **

Connie ran her fingers through her hair as she looked at her husband, she could see the tears in his eyes as she told him what happened to their little girl and she knew that she never wanted to see that look on his face ever again.

"How could this have happened?"

"She was at a party..."

"You let her go to a party?!" She shook her head, tears falling down her own face now,

"She was with her friends, I thought it would be safe."

"Obviously not!" She looked up at him, his face red with despair and anger as his fists clenched,

"This isn't my fault." She whispered, looking down at the floor as she tried to convince herself that she couldn't have done anything,

"Oh God, I know love, I am so sorry. I just want my little girl to be okay." He shook his head, letting the tears fall from his eyes as he wrapped the sobbing woman in his arms.

"She told me what happened when I got back from the studios, we went to the police but they said without enough evidence..." She trailed off, she couldn't think about that man roaming free while her daughter was completely broken.

"I brought her here, I thought it would be better to get away from that place. And I-I, um, booked an appointment with a psychiatrist..." Michael – Sonny's dad – nodded as he held his wife in his arms.

Connie looked up at him as he sighed, "She's going to be okay."

"It just all hurts so much – she doesn't sleep and when she does she wakes up screaming, she won't eat unless I force her to and she won't even get out of bed sometimes."

"We will make sure she gets through this, I promise you." Connie nodded, a small smile on her face as she wrapped her arms around him even tighter,

"She's awake at the moment, I think I will go in with her and make sure she gets at least an hours sleep before I take her to that appointment tomorrow."

"Good idea, tell her I love her." He whispered, kissing her gently on the lips before shaking his head sadly and walking into their bedroom, wanting to be alone with his thoughts as hot and heavy tears ran down his now pale face.

- - - - - - - -

Sonny wrapped her arms around her knees as she rocked back and forth, looking around her old bedroom as she tried to ignore the sound of voices on the other side of her bedroom door. She hated being talked about, she knew that everyone was worried about her but she wanted them to all leave her alone.

She bit down on her lower lip as it trembled, her eyes glazing with tears as they always did as she squeezed them tight shut to stop herself from crying out. She wanted to forget about it but it seemed impossible, every single time she thought she would be okay, something would happen and she would run up into her bedroom and cry again.

Sonny had come to the conclusion that she was never going to be okay, she was never going to be Sonny from 'So Random!' again. She bit down hard as she dug her nails deeper and deeper into her exposed legs, staring at the door as the doorknob turned.

"Sonny?" She looked at the woman as she walked through, trying her best to smile at her broken daughter. She could see the girl shaking with fear, her eyes never leaving her mother as she walked across the room and sat on the end of the bed.

"Is it okay if I hold you until you go to sleep?" Her mother asked kindly, knowing it was best to ask Sonny at the moment, she nodded and tried to give her a small smile as she moved up in the bed and sighed.

Connie smiled, sitting next to her tiny, shaking daughter before wrapping her arms gently but firmly around her. She heaved a deep sigh when Sonny wrapped her arms around her waist, tears falling down her face and onto Connie's shirt.

"It's nearly three in the morning, you should try and get a little sleep."

"I can't." Sonny whispered, the tears falling heavily down her face now as she sobbed a little, tightening her grip around her mother as she put her head on her chest as they both lay back down onto the bed.

Connie bit down on her lip to stop herself from crying as she rubbed her daughter's back, trying to ignore the feel of all her bones as she did so, "It's all going to be okay baby girl, I will stay up with you all night if you need me to." Sonny nodded,

"I'm sorry."

"None of this is your fault, I just wish you would have said something a little sooner so we could have gone to the police." Connie shook her head, Sonny had only told her what happened three days ago and they had been told by the police that there was nothing they could do about it without evidence – even though they were still going to investigate it, they didn't think they would ever find him without evidence.

"I wish I did too." Connie smiled, "But don't worry, I am going to make sure you get through this, and your dad." Sonny nodded, biting down on her lip,

"Why ain't daddy in here?"

"Do you want him to? He wasn't sure if you would let him..." Sonny just nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks at the thought of her dad avoiding having any contact with her.

"Stay here baby, I will go get him." She shook her head, grabbing her mum's hand,

"Can I stay in your bed?" A small blush crept onto her cheeks as she thought about all those times when she was younger and she would have nightmares about monsters under her bed, her parents would always let her in their bed and she would feel safe again. She could only hope she would feel the same this time.

"Of course baby girl." Connie kissed her daughter on the forehead, taking her hand and helping her weak body up, leading her slowly out of the room to make sure she didn't collapse from the sudden pressure on her shaking legs.

"Mike?" She whispered into the dark room, smiling at him when he sat up in their bed and looked from her to their daughter,

"What's wrong? Are you okay beautiful?" He looked at Sonny as she nodded, biting down on her lip as she looked down at the floor, obviously embarrassed by what she had asked.

"Sonny couldn't sleep so she wanted to come in here with us." Connie explained, nodding at her husband as he moved over in the bed and grinned at the girl he loved so much, and would always see as his little girl.

"Thank you daddy." She whispered, moving over to the bed with her mum's help,

"Do you need a cuddle?" He murmured, his eyes lighting up when she nodded, wrapping her in his arms as they all lay down in the large bed.

"Night baby." He said before kissing her gently on the forehead, his arms wrapped around her body, smiling when the shaking finally stopped and she relaxed into his arms. Connie looked on at them before putting her arm on top of her husbands and closing her eyes, hoping that Sonny would be okay one day.

**A/N: I decided to change my usual style and have someone else help Sonny through it, other than Chad.. for now anyway. **

**Which do you all prefer though?**

**The parental help? Or Channy love? **

**Drop me a review. **


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: See last chapter **

**~ Chapter Six ~ **

Chad looked down at his hands, biting down on his lip as hard as he possibly could to stop himself from crying, he kept wishing that he had never invited her to that stupid party in the first place. He scoffed a little as he thought about that night, he was going to finally tell her how he felt about her but of course, CDC got in the way and he started flirting with some other girl while Sonny was getting... he couldn't even bring himself to say the word, it hurt too much.

He winced a little when he felt blood drip down his chin from his lip, shaking his head as he wiped it away, he deserved the pain because if he hadn't left her on her own then everything would be okay right now and she would still be his Sonshine.

He thought about that night, the way he had practically begged her to come with him just because he wanted her there by his side, but then he only ended up letting her down in the end, just like he let everyone else down.

"_Sonny, please." Chad looked at the girl in front of him as she shook her head, _

"_I told you, I don't like parties like that..."  
"I will keep you safe though." He grinned at her, putting a hand on her shoulder as he looked into her beautiful eyes, wanting nothing more than to tell her how he felt right there and then. _

"_Will you Chad? Will you really?" She looked up at him expectingly as she shrugged his hand off, immediately missing his touch as she bit down on her lip and tried to ignore the feeling. _

"_Yes, I would." He rolled his eyes, his eyes sparkling as he gave her his biggest and best grin ever. _

"_Fine." She muttered, heaving a deep sigh before she walked away,_

"_Pick you up at eight." He shouted after her, smiling when she gave him a thumbs up before turning around the corner. _

Chad sighed again, his hand shaking as he reached out for the photograph on his desk of the girl he longed to hold in his arms and apologize to. There were a million things that he wished he could do right there and then, and one of them was to turn back time and never leave her on her own.

"_I will go get us a drink." _

"_I will come with you then." Sonny looked around the crowded house, biting down on her lip in nervousness as she gripped onto Chad's arm tightly,_

"_Sonny, I will be five seconds, just stay right here." _

"_No, please..." She begged him, tears threatening to fall down her face as she looked up at him, _

"_Sonny don't be such a baby, I promise you that I won't be long." _

"_Fine." She muttered, her hand dropping from his arm as she folded them over her chest and looked around the place uncomfortably. _

"_I will be right back." He whispered in her ear before walking away, forcing his way through the crowds until he got to the drinks table and grabbed two cups for him and Sonny. He shook his head when a girl came up to him, knowing he promised Sonny but then again, he was CDC, Sonny could wait. He flashed his perfect teeth at the girl as she giggled, twirling her hair in her fingers as they undeniably flirted with each other..._

He felt a rush of anger run through his whole body, he had left her _alone, _he was **flirting **while she was being pulled into a bedroom by some guy, "I hate you." He whispered to his own reflection, standing up quickly only to raise his fist to the mirror, slamming it down as hard as he could and smiling when he felt the blood drip down his fist.

He could hear people rushing behind him, trying to stop the bleeding but he didn't care, he just wanted Sonny safe again, he just wanted to help her, "Leave me alone." He finally whispered to them, looking around the room at the various people he worked with.

He looked down at his hand and then at the mirror, "I'm fine, just fine..." He sighed before walking away from them all, grabbing everything he could and walking out of the studios, he was going to make sure Sonny got better, he was going to make sure she got through all of this, he was going to help her.

"Where are you going?" He could hear random calls from the people who considered themselves to be his friend, but the people he only thought to be his cast members. He had never **cared** about them, he had never been _worried _if they had been hurt and vice versa. Sonny was different though, he found himself wanting to stop her from hurting, he wanted to be able to make her better, he **loved **her.

- - - - - - - - - -

Sonny stared down at the bowl in front of her blankly, never really seeing what was in there, never really knowing what she was doing, never really being able to feel a thing. She heaved a deep sigh as the looked up at her parents, tears falling down her pale cheeks as she bit down hard on her lower lip and she tried her best to just lift up the spoon her mother had placed in front of her. But everything was too hard these days, she never seemed to have the energy.

She thought back to a few days ago when she had to see the psychologist, she hadn't wanted to talk about what happened, she didn't want to have to go through it all again. So, she had refused and ended up walking out of there having said nothing to the kind woman, with her mother accusing her of not wanting help. Sonny didn't care though, she wanted help but not from some stupid woman she didn't know, she wanted help from someone else, someone special.

"Sonny darling, you have to eat." Connie stared at her tiny daughter, her baggy clothing only made her appear even smaller than she already was. Mike looked at the girl as well, remembering the way all her bones had felt underneath his touch last night as he tried his best to comfort the crying girl when she woke up after a nightmare. He could only wish that this would stop soon, it was every parents worst nightmare to see their child die before their very eyes.

"Sorry." She whispered, even speaking was a large amount of effort for her, everything hurt too much, everything seemed to remind her that she was still alive and she wasn't as numb as she felt.

"The doctor wants to prescribe you with anti-depressants Sonny, I don't want them to do that but it's going to happen."

"I can't." She shook her head, tears falling down her face before there was a knock on the door causing all three to jump.

Sonny looked at her mum, her eyes wide with fear at the thought of someone else being here, "Mummy? Are we expecting anyone?" Connie shook her head, biting down on her lip as Mike stood up to get it.

"Sorry to disturb you sir but I am a friend of Sonny's..." He looked at the blonde headed boy at the door, recognizing him as the boy Sonny had photographs of in her bedroom.

"Chad Dylan Cooper?" He raised an eyebrow, what would he be doing here?

"Yes sir, I just wanted to let you know just how much I love you daughter and if she's willing to accept my help then I would love to be able to give it to her."

"You can come in but I'm not sure how she will react." He sighed, looking the boy up and down, only wishing that this could be the answer to his prayers, no matter how much he and Connie loved their daughter, nothing seemed to be working.

"Thank you sir." Chad nodded at him, taking a deep breath before following him in, he suddenly felt a wave of nervousness rush through him, his hand shaking as she thought about what could have possibly made him come all the way to Wisconsin just to help a girl who may kick him out and who may go mad again.

"Chad?" He looked at her, shaking his head. It had been a whole week since he had seen her last but he hardly recognized her, she had lost half her body weight at least, her eyes no longer sparkled, her face was completely pale and the hair he once called pretty was hanging limply over her shoulders.

"Hey Sonshine." He smiled at her, taking a cautious step forward before waving at Connie,

"Why are you here?" She frowned at the sight of him, she had longed for him to come but that didn't mean it made him just being in the same room as her any less uncomfortable.

"I just wanted to let you know that I am here for you.." He ran his fingers through his hair, sighing as he looked at her, "I know it's my fault that you were... raped... but I want to help you."

"It's not your fault." She whispered, Chad stumbled back a little as Sonny shook her head,

"I blamed you at first but it's not your fault." He sighed, typical nice Sonny, she wouldn't blame anyone else.

"Chad?" Connie looked at her little girl, smiling a little as she stood up, Chad looked at her and then at her parents, turning back to Sonny as he smiled,

"Can you hold me?" Her cheeks turned a light shade of pink as she grabbed onto the table to keep herself steady as her legs shook, Chad nodded quickly and walked over to her, taking her in his arms as Connie and Mike looked on, both breathing a sigh of relief as they started to clear up and leave the two teenagers alone as they wrapped their arms around each other.

**A/N: So they are finally together, thank God. What did you think of the little reunion? Will Chad be able to help Sonny through it? **


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Seven ~ **

He held her that night as she slept, not being able to let go of her tiny body as he rocked her slightly back and forth, whispering words of comfort in her ears as her body lightly shook a little as her eyes fluttered, small moans escaping her mouth every now and again as she responded to a nightmare that everyone else could only just imagine.

He held her tightly as her grip tightened on his waist, her fists clenching as she tried her best to fight off the invisible monster that remained in her dreams and memories. He looked down at her, brushing some hair out of her sweating face as tears ran down his own face. He bit down on his lip as he thought about everything she had been through and yet here she was, with him.

He held her as he cried, burying his head in her hair to muffle out his own sobs of despair as he thought about how selfish he had always been. How he could have just _cared _about her and she wouldn't be in this mess right now, how he could have just stopped denying his feelings and just _told _her there and then, like he had been planning to do.

He held her and rubbed her back gently as he tried to ignore the feel of her bones underneath his fingertips, knowing that what had happened to her was to blame for all of this.

He held her in his arms as tightly as he possibly could as he planned ways to hurt this guy as badly as he could. He imagined wrapping his hands around his neck, he fantasized about punching him over and over again, he conceived the idea of hunting him down and showing him exactly how much pain he had inflicted on Sonny. If only he knew who it was.

He held her in his arms as she woke up, tears running down her face from her big brown eyes as she looked up at him, sighing in content as she wrapped her arms tighter around him and closed her eyes again, "It's not your fault." She whispered.

He looked down at her, shaking his head and then sighing, she knew him too well, "It is, you know it is."

"You weren't to know, it's not your fault."

"It's not yours." He muttered, he knew her too well as well.

She was taken back for a moment, opening her eyes only to close them again as tears cascaded down her face, "It is, I-I could have stopped him, I-I shouldn't h-have.." She sobbed, her fingers curling around his shirt, hot and heavy tears running down her face,

"It wasn't your fault, there was nothing you could have done to stop him. It's not your fault." He closed his own eyes, not bothering to hide the fact he was crying in front of her as he held her tightly in his arms, wishing her shaking body would relax as she sobbed into his chest, both of them just wishing the pain would stop.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Eight ~ **

Chad smiled at the girl sitting across from him, watching her as she slowly lifted up her fork, her hand shaking as it took all of her energy just to put a tiny bit of food in her mouth. He frowned, he had no idea when the last time she had ate was but he knew for sure it had been a long time, too long.

"Do you want me to help you?" He finally said, putting down his toast as he got up and smiled at her, she looked at him for a moment, a tiny blush creeping on her ghostly pale face as he took the fork off her.

He put one hand on her hair for a second, brushing it back out of her face as a silent tear fell down her cheek, "It's not that I don't want to.. I can't." She whispered, her eyes filled with desperation, needing him to understand.

"You can." He looked at her, letting his fingers trail down her cheek, letting his fingers rest for a while underneath her chin before lifting it up so she was looking him right in the eyes, just to make sure she could see how much he needed her to eat, he wanted her to know just how scared he was.

He stared at her intently, heaving a light sigh before smiling, "I love you." He muttered as he kissed her gently on the forehead, shaking his head when he pulled away, "Sorry it took me so long to realize it."

She nodded, her mouth open a little as she tried to think of the best thing to say, "Chad?" She closed her eyes, not wanting to ruin the moment but needing to know the answer,

"Where did you go? That night?"

"I was talking to some fans, I lost track of time." He bit down on his lip as she nodded,

"So you didn't just forget about me then?" He adamantly shook his head,

"I could never forget about you, I went back to where I left you with our drinks and you were gone." He let his forehead rest on hers, "I thought you were dancing or something, I had no idea, I am so sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for." She murmured, taking a deep breath before closing her eyes tightly and leaning up to kiss him lightly on the lips, "I love you too."

He grinned as he picked up her fork again, watching her take every bite as they smiled at each other, blushing every now and again as they caught each others eye. He sighed as he watched her walk up to her mum when they were done, shaking a little but not as much as before and he knew that it was going to take a very long time for her to get over it but he was going to make sure he was there for her every step away, even when she said she didn't need him, he was going to love her no matter what.

Nothing could break them apart.

**A/N: Pathetic ending, I know. But I have way too many stories up (Not moaning, it's my own fault. I have ideas all the time and I can never resist.) So yeah, I thought I would end this one seeing as it's one of the ones I am mostly stuck on. **

**Thank you for reading, and goodnight! **


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